The den of illusions

Who likes to accept a certain amount of change in a loved one? Some would agree and some won't, it actually counts on the nature of change. All of us are living deep in our own world of illusions and most of the time we are not even aware of them. Though we actually call ourselves free, we listen obediently to the thoughts created and they are rarely questioned. Lack of questioning makes us the slaves of our own illusions. 

We enslave ourselves within the realm of our dreams which is not at all a bad thing. Dreams are meant to be pursued but one must be free to act while adapting the most appropriate response towards any situation. Blindly obeying the orders may make you land up nowhere. For avoiding that, one must know to differentiate the soul from the cage of illusions.

I would first like to engage myself in the topic 'change'. We all know what change is and we have read endless articles where it is explained that one must accept change and how we must know to let go the people who have changed, etc, etc. Just as you must have gone through a series of shocking experiences where your loved one is behaving differently, I too have felt the astonishment and wept until the meaning finally settled in. It's so easy to get hurt.

I tried to let myself go into this matter very deeply. To be more specific, I actually started observing my thoughts. When this happened, I witnessed a kind of new awakening where I realised pleasure brings pain at some time but the same pleasure is nothing but an illusion. After all it's just a feeling.

Let me explain it to you more clearly. Imagine those best friends of yours who have now become complete strangers. This incident has happened with most of us and hence is the best example. We make new friends, start to know each other well, things seem to go pretty well at the beginning and our minds create a judgment that 'you have got an ideal friend!' Situations could be equalised with that judgment and we believe it. 

Now where does the problem occur? The mind keeps on replaying (as usual) the traits of your friend which are most likeable and you feel that 'our relation is going to work like this forever!' The word 'forever' makes one quite vulnerable I think. You are gaining pleasure from some one's company but the belief of 'forever' is nothing but an illusion! Each one desires to experience pleasure but when that slowly starts turning into an illusion, you are trapped into the game of your mind. 

This illusion gets shattered by the reality. Reality underlines the fact that the behaviour of anybody is not going to be the same in every situation. If a person has started behaving differently, try to observe the situation. You would get your answer and you would be less shaken. 

But what we do is feel bad about it. The sole reason for this is that the belief which we were carrying all the time has been challenged and we suddenly feel that we were kept in the dark. This greatly hurts our self-esteem and we realise that we have been cheated. Or some feel that they have been taken for granted. 

The best way I feel to come out of such situations is to not to get trapped in an illusion. Mind loves to create fantasies but just listen to them. Don't let them enslave you in their den. That is because there is a huge difference in listening and believing. 

Some of you must have different techniques to tackle drastic changes and I respect them. The write-up of my thought process is not to challenge anyone's belief. But yes, it might be helpful in solving your problem. :)