Who is the ideal one for you?

Who is the ideal one for you?

Each one of us tries to seek an answer to this question during our teenage years. Teenage. An age where some biological force makes us so rebellious and we tend to make many mistakes that we couldn't have imagined of. It's an age where we want to have wings and fly off to a place where there are no restrictions and boundaries. These years are not that complicated as it seems only if we learn to handle those precious moments with care.

Being in a relationship is one of the most exciting experiences of a teenager. That feeling when you realise that you have successfully found a soulmate cannot be explained with words. You feel ecstatic about having achieved something great and you feel tempted to share that experience with one of your best friends. They tease you and your cheeks turn red with merriness. Your mind is like a bird soaring high in the sky and your thoughts visualise the image of only one person: your soulmate.

You get distracted. That's the best part. Your priorities change and spending time with your soulmate becomes the only important thing for you. Sending and receiving messages becomes your favourite hobby. A heart-shaped emoticon or some love quotes sent by your partner makes your heart melt like chocolate. You realise that you have achieved all the happiness of the world and a million dollar smile would always be glued on your face. 

What else do you need?

Then comes the fight. A powerful instrument that could destroy any damn thing. Small fights take the shape of large fights and it eventually leads into break up. The period between small and large fight is very tense. It is like you are trying to grasp the sand but most of it has already slipped through your fingers. 

You know that it's not working but you two still try to hold on it. The person with whom you used to feel happy once upon a time has become the reason for your built up stress. The trauma is heart-breaking and you feel that it's the end of the world. This is what happens most of the time and people cover it up by just blaming each other. 

Where did you know that a beautiful dream of yours would turn into a nightmare someday?

People have encountered this trauma and have come out of it. But there are many who are stuck into this nightmare and are taking depression pills. Pill can only give you some temporary relief. But if you really wish to free yourself from the chains of an unsuccessful teenage relationship, just do one thing: laugh. Just laugh at yourself! It didn't work out because there was no proper understanding! It's neither your fault nor the fault of your ex-soulmate. It's just the trick of some biological force that decreases mental activity and enforces the game of hormones. The game of hormones creates the thoughts of attraction. The thoughts of attraction are entirely designed by emotions due to which every step of yours is not a result of analysation. That's where one turns out to be rebellious and many fights occur. So was your teenage relationship ever a serious one? Or was it that you and your ex-soulmate were fighting a battle created by the 'game of hormones?'

Think about it. 

Are you afraid of being alone?

There is a fear that creeps in the mind of every individual. A fear that is consistent and whose clutches are strong. It prevails in the mind for an entire life time, we do sense it and try to run away from it. The escapism has many paths and we develop them for our own satisfaction. The route of escapism can be technology which we link as progress or development. It can be a route that may provide temporary excitement and thrill to us which we link as a recreation. Greater the population, greater and varied are the routes of escapism. 

This fear is the fear of being alone. No one likes to be alone. Every human being has a void deep inside that desires to be fulfilled from time to time. That is why we always try to identify ourselves with a person, a group or an object. It gives us a sense of security and satisfaction. It provides the mind with a purpose to be occupied and to forget the worries and anxieties that doesn't allow us to live our lives completely.

Why do we love to socialise? The common answer to this is to share your ideas, views and experiences with others. But it doesn't cover the in depth answer to this question. Why is there a common tendency to be occupied with your phone if there is no one around to talk to you? Why is that you call up your friends to know whether they are coming to college with you? That's because we are best friends! Yeah? Or is it because you don't want to sit alone in a class where the others are busy occupied with their groups, chatting and laughing?

You already know the answer. Our thinking has been conditioned in a certain way. We feel happy when we find ourselves in the company of others. We are afraid of being alone and we detest the word 'loneliness.'

But why are we afraid of being alone? I don't have any answer. Maybe it's because I have never confronted it and always tried to run away from it. That is what we all generally do. 

Can this fear be destroyed? Well it's truly said that fear can die only when we face it and not when we try to escape from it. So can facing the loneliness be termed as 'solitude?'I feel it can be. There is no clear-cut answer to these questions. And the answers would vary from person to person. But it would be interesting to question yourself rather than blindly listening to what others are saying. Who knows that you may experience the first stage of ever-lasting solitude!

Well it's your birthday!:))

A day where everything must turn out to be entirely special is a birthday. No one wishes to celebrate their birthday wherein a thought like 'it could have been more interesting' lingers in their minds. We all love to make that special day completely perfect. Desires are at the peak and any conflict in it turns your emotions upside down. 

Next year is my 18th birthday. Some of my relatives are more excited than me and were a bit successful in widening the importance I held for my 18th birthday in my heart. For now, I don't hold any excitement for my 18th birthday. In fact I don't hold any excitement for celebrating any of my birthdays in future. 

I know it's quite surprising and idiotic at the same time. Who doesn't love to celebrate his/her own birthday? But why are people so inclined towards this idea? Just because you were born on that day?  But have you ever thought like this that you are rejoicing an incident wherein your contribution is entirely zero and you are actually giving huge reverence to someone else's efforts? (Wink*)

I am not against the idea of celebrating this auspicious day. Neither I want to persuade you to change your view point about it. I just want to describe my approach towards it from a different dimension. What if your desires regarding the implementation of your plan doesn't work out on your birthday? As I mentioned in the earlier paragraphs, your emotions would turn upside down. The so called wonderful day turns into an emotional disaster. What is the use of calling it a special occasion?

Birthdays have introduced a new type of pleasure that is 'pleasure of partying.' Calling your friends at home or in some club have become catchy and popular ideas. Partying or having a blast on b'day is very enjoyable and also acts as a stress buster. But at the same time, people have become too much depended on such activities. It has turned out to be some kind of addiction. Organising parties or being in a position to enjoy oneself in an expensive club leads to ego-boost. But how long can you retain happiness through such 'ego-boost?' 

Feeling happy or excited on birthday is a human tendency and celebration is closely connected to it. I don't wish to remove any unfavourable points from that matter. But according to me, one must try not to limit his/her happiness to a mere celebration which in true sense is completely superficial. Whatever the situation is, you should be happy! Whether it is a birthday, anniversary or any other event, don't let the expectations have a negative impact over your mood. After all we as a society have created this system and once we look deep into it, there will be a unique freedom that one can rejoice over. 

Once that freedom is felt, only your present will matter to you and not the red letter days!